My Little Duece,
You are now fully formed, or at least almost from what I gather. You are the size of a fig. You have a heart and organs. Soon your little fists will open and your tooth buds that will later form baby teeth are starting to develop. Even some of your teeny tiny bones are beginning to harden.
I can't believe how much better I am feeling as well. The Doc's meds have really helped, I am sure. It is nice to get closer and closer to the second trimester because that means my tummy will settle and my energy will return. Those two things I was certainly taking for granted and I cannot wait to have them restored! You however are worth every bit of discomfort little one. Your one and a half inch body is an astounding miracle and I am simply in awe all the time.
Well, in other news, your big brother still has no idea about you. Your father and I haven't really tried to share with him what is happening, in fact we haven't shared you with a lot of people quite yet. But that is something I really look forward to. I know he will have no idea what we are talking about, but still it will be nice to help him along and get him excited about your arrival.
Love you lots,
Mama
Monday, January 27, 2014
Monday, January 20, 2014
(Baby Week 10) Monday, December 20th 2013
Well Deuce,
Today we visited our favorite Doc in American Fork, the first official appointment for you. It made me anxious and a little excited too, knowing that we would probably be able to hear your heart beat today. So, your Papa and I dropped your big brother off at G.G's house and headed to the clinic. There were a lot of people in the waiting room and we had to do a bit of waiting ourselves, which did nothing to help me nerves. Finally we were called back.
The nurses helping us today were not the usual, but Aunt Carol was there and passed by the door a few times smiling in at us while we answered the general questions and I had my blood pressure taken. Not long after, Dr. Willis came in. The first thing he said when he walked in the door was, "You're pregnant!" We all smiled and I nodded. Next he got right down to business, figuring out how far along I was. Then, as Aunt Carol passed the door he asked her to grab the Doppler so we could listen for you. Here it was, the part I was anticipating and dreading at the same time. The moment of truth!
They gooped up my tummy and slid the Doppler around a lot. The placenta, growing in there with you, was extremely loud--whooshing and churning. I couldn't hear your little heart beat and kept straining and straining my ears. The Doc could hear you though, he is trained for it. So he kept sliding the Doppler higher and lower, pressing it into my tummy looking for you. Then, after what seemed an eternity, I heard the little thumping of your tiny heart. I exhaled in relief and so did your Papa who was sitting very still in his chair. Later he told me he was holding his breath too, waiting to hear you.
So, as you might imagine, we are overjoyed that things are going well this time. Mommy now has medicine to help with the nausea and you are growing and developing nicely. We love you so much already and are very excited to grow and develop with you over these next months.
Love you little one!
Mama
Today we visited our favorite Doc in American Fork, the first official appointment for you. It made me anxious and a little excited too, knowing that we would probably be able to hear your heart beat today. So, your Papa and I dropped your big brother off at G.G's house and headed to the clinic. There were a lot of people in the waiting room and we had to do a bit of waiting ourselves, which did nothing to help me nerves. Finally we were called back.
The nurses helping us today were not the usual, but Aunt Carol was there and passed by the door a few times smiling in at us while we answered the general questions and I had my blood pressure taken. Not long after, Dr. Willis came in. The first thing he said when he walked in the door was, "You're pregnant!" We all smiled and I nodded. Next he got right down to business, figuring out how far along I was. Then, as Aunt Carol passed the door he asked her to grab the Doppler so we could listen for you. Here it was, the part I was anticipating and dreading at the same time. The moment of truth!
They gooped up my tummy and slid the Doppler around a lot. The placenta, growing in there with you, was extremely loud--whooshing and churning. I couldn't hear your little heart beat and kept straining and straining my ears. The Doc could hear you though, he is trained for it. So he kept sliding the Doppler higher and lower, pressing it into my tummy looking for you. Then, after what seemed an eternity, I heard the little thumping of your tiny heart. I exhaled in relief and so did your Papa who was sitting very still in his chair. Later he told me he was holding his breath too, waiting to hear you.
So, as you might imagine, we are overjoyed that things are going well this time. Mommy now has medicine to help with the nausea and you are growing and developing nicely. We love you so much already and are very excited to grow and develop with you over these next months.
Love you little one!
Mama
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
(Baby Week 7) Tuesday, December 31st 2013
Dear Deuce,
You are the size of a blueberry, in fact probably a little bigger because this is technically the very end of week seven. Wow! I can't believe how much in my life is changing already, because of you little one. Time is going by quickly because of the Holidays and the coming of the New Year. I can't help but imagine what next year will be like for our little family with you as a new addition. It is exciting, to be sure.
One thing, it is getting more and more difficult keeping you a secret. Mommy is sick, very sick and very tired. This is hard to hide--especially because we have been spending so much time with family. My excuse about having a small stomach bug will only last so long. Also, funny the way things work out, but my cousin just announced that they are expecting, baby supposedly due at the end of August. When they told the family I couldn't stop smiling and exchanging knowing glances with your dad. "Ha! Us too!" I wanted to shout, but didn't, because for right now you are just ours.
We love you so, so much. We hope you are growing nicely in there and that everything is working out as it should. Fingers crossed!
Love always,
Mama
You are the size of a blueberry, in fact probably a little bigger because this is technically the very end of week seven. Wow! I can't believe how much in my life is changing already, because of you little one. Time is going by quickly because of the Holidays and the coming of the New Year. I can't help but imagine what next year will be like for our little family with you as a new addition. It is exciting, to be sure.
One thing, it is getting more and more difficult keeping you a secret. Mommy is sick, very sick and very tired. This is hard to hide--especially because we have been spending so much time with family. My excuse about having a small stomach bug will only last so long. Also, funny the way things work out, but my cousin just announced that they are expecting, baby supposedly due at the end of August. When they told the family I couldn't stop smiling and exchanging knowing glances with your dad. "Ha! Us too!" I wanted to shout, but didn't, because for right now you are just ours.
We love you so, so much. We hope you are growing nicely in there and that everything is working out as it should. Fingers crossed!
Love always,
Mama
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
(Baby Week 6) Wednesday, December 18th 2013
Tiny Little Baby,
You are officially the size of a lentil, and though I have no idea what that is I am very happy to know you are growing and evolving. Also I guess your nose, ears, and mouth are starting to form! Holy smokes that is so crazy to think about. I can't even imagine how small they must be right now. Obviously small enough to fit on the face of a lentil. Anyways, it is exciting stuff and I can't wait to see what those little features grow to become.
The symptoms are in full swing for mommy. I get nauseous easily and several times a day. I am tired a lot and hardly motivated to do any work around the house. Just ask your Papa and Big Brother--they will tell you just how messy things are getting. Also, I cannot believe Xmas is coming so soon! Before we know it cousins will be here, presents will be opened, and it will all be over. I will miss the rush of the Holiday season, but at least will have to hope of you to help get me through the bleak of January and February.
Well, good luck growing in there little one. We will be making a appointment to meet with the doctor when you are about 10 weeks, so until then, just keep doing great, and miraculous things in there.
Love you so much,
Mama
You are officially the size of a lentil, and though I have no idea what that is I am very happy to know you are growing and evolving. Also I guess your nose, ears, and mouth are starting to form! Holy smokes that is so crazy to think about. I can't even imagine how small they must be right now. Obviously small enough to fit on the face of a lentil. Anyways, it is exciting stuff and I can't wait to see what those little features grow to become.
The symptoms are in full swing for mommy. I get nauseous easily and several times a day. I am tired a lot and hardly motivated to do any work around the house. Just ask your Papa and Big Brother--they will tell you just how messy things are getting. Also, I cannot believe Xmas is coming so soon! Before we know it cousins will be here, presents will be opened, and it will all be over. I will miss the rush of the Holiday season, but at least will have to hope of you to help get me through the bleak of January and February.
Well, good luck growing in there little one. We will be making a appointment to meet with the doctor when you are about 10 weeks, so until then, just keep doing great, and miraculous things in there.
Love you so much,
Mama
Monday, December 9, 2013
(Baby Week 4 Approx.) Monday, December 9th 2013
Dear Little Bundle,
Well at least we are hoping you are a little spec. We have not confirmed your existence quite yet, but a few things have happened that make your little life very, very possible. So I am writing to you, believing and dreaming and wishing that all will be well and in about 9 months we will be able to meet you and officially welcome you to this world.
Truth be told, I am completely hesitant to begin this little letter writing tradition with you so early. I started one about six months ago for the same reason, the same beginning, the same hoping, and later came back and deleted them all because it didn't go according to plan. At the time, deleting those little notes to my other little spec seemed like the only thing to do. Now though, I wish I had kept them, because I know that experience, no matter how disappointing, is not something that can be so easily erased. It wasn't all bad either.
There was so much good and joy that simply came from believing and hoping. And there was even some good in the difficulty of knowing it wasn't going to work out and going through the process of letting that would-be-baby go. Heartbreaking, but also a sweet strength that prepared me for some other hard things ahead. Which is why I am starting anew with you, little one--with that same hope and love.
You give us such great joy and no matter the ending. This hope is vibrant and real for us right now. I am not likely to publish that hope to the world just yet, but I will file this letter away and make the series known when the time is right, if the time is ever right. We fiercely want you to become a permanent part of this family. We want to make room and make plans for you in our life. We want that real joy to last forever.
So, in short, I just wanted you to know, you are important. Physically, you are only a tiny bundle of cells right now, but you are important. You are important to me, to your father, and to your brother.
Love,
Your New Family
Well at least we are hoping you are a little spec. We have not confirmed your existence quite yet, but a few things have happened that make your little life very, very possible. So I am writing to you, believing and dreaming and wishing that all will be well and in about 9 months we will be able to meet you and officially welcome you to this world.
Truth be told, I am completely hesitant to begin this little letter writing tradition with you so early. I started one about six months ago for the same reason, the same beginning, the same hoping, and later came back and deleted them all because it didn't go according to plan. At the time, deleting those little notes to my other little spec seemed like the only thing to do. Now though, I wish I had kept them, because I know that experience, no matter how disappointing, is not something that can be so easily erased. It wasn't all bad either.
There was so much good and joy that simply came from believing and hoping. And there was even some good in the difficulty of knowing it wasn't going to work out and going through the process of letting that would-be-baby go. Heartbreaking, but also a sweet strength that prepared me for some other hard things ahead. Which is why I am starting anew with you, little one--with that same hope and love.
You give us such great joy and no matter the ending. This hope is vibrant and real for us right now. I am not likely to publish that hope to the world just yet, but I will file this letter away and make the series known when the time is right, if the time is ever right. We fiercely want you to become a permanent part of this family. We want to make room and make plans for you in our life. We want that real joy to last forever.
So, in short, I just wanted you to know, you are important. Physically, you are only a tiny bundle of cells right now, but you are important. You are important to me, to your father, and to your brother.
Love,
Your New Family
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
(Blake 2 Years Old) November 6th 2013
My Sweet, Sick Baby Boy,
Two days ago you had a bad fever. I knew then that something was wrong with you, but it was just one day after your big birthday and I didn't want to believe it. When I say your temp was high, I mean about 103 degrees, pretty stressful for this Mama. Anyways, we gave you some Tylenol and brought your temp down a bit and just let you rest the day away. This went on for one day, and then one more. By then things were looking pretty bad. You were tired all the time. You didn't really want to eat. Fortunately you were drinking a ton and besides a few little coughs and a small runny nose, you didn't have any other symptoms. I did call the doctor though. Then that morning, just before we went to see Doc Willis, you finally were showing symptoms of an ear ache.
You woke up super early this morning. You coughed and would hold your ear. Then you would say, in this sweet little voice, "Mama, kisses." Then you would pat your ear. I gave you a million kisses that morning, wishing that was all it took to make it better. I was so happy to get to the doctor's office and have them check you out. They said yes, your temp was a little high. They said yes, you probably weren't feeling well. Then Doc Willis looked in your ears. He said, "Ouch," and immediately prescribed some medicine for you.
Then we drove a little ways to pick up your perscription, grabbed a get well soon book from the grocery store, and headed home to rest, watch Cars, and get better. Right now you sleep, sweaty in my arms and I am soaking up each little surface of your face. I love your little mouth hanging open. I hate the purple bruise like skin around your eyes that means you have not been sleeping. I like the sweaty bed-head that happens during your naps, but hate that it means you have a temperature.
Please, please, please get well soon Littleman. We love you and were so worried. Hopefully soon we will have you back to normal. Chin up, we got this baby boy.
Love always,
Mama
Friday, November 1, 2013
(Blake Officially 2 Years Old) November 1st 2013
I cannot believe you are officially two. T-W-O! I have been training you these last weeks to hold up your little fingers and say, "Two!" when I ask, "Hey Blake, how old are you?" It was so sweet, but still very surreal and never true. But now it is true. You are "two!" and holy cow it came so fast.
Here is a quick list of some of the things you REALLY love right now:
Here is a quick list of some of the things you REALLY love right now:
Movie: Cars or Aristocats
Color: Blue
Food: Cheese
Drink: Warm Milk
Stuffed Animal: NeeNee Doggie
Toy: Cars, Trains, or Trucks (of any kind)
Animal: Tiger
Superhero: Superman
Phrase: Come On Mama
Place: GG's House
Sport: Soccer
Song: Waiting for Superman by Daughtry
We had a little Superhero party for friends and family. We had dessert and opened presents. There was so much going on that you were completely distracted. You didn't even want to eat your cake--again! But that is just fine. I would do it all over again, just the same. Your smile the entire night was perfection and you were so happy to be sharing this special day with those who love you most.
Well Blake, Happy 2nd Birthday kiddo. Your dad and I love you so, so much. We can't imagine this life without you and hope keep things going just as they have been.
Love, love, love
Color: Blue
Food: Cheese
Drink: Warm Milk
Stuffed Animal: NeeNee Doggie
Toy: Cars, Trains, or Trucks (of any kind)
Animal: Tiger
Superhero: Superman
Phrase: Come On Mama
Place: GG's House
Sport: Soccer
Song: Waiting for Superman by Daughtry
We had a little Superhero party for friends and family. We had dessert and opened presents. There was so much going on that you were completely distracted. You didn't even want to eat your cake--again! But that is just fine. I would do it all over again, just the same. Your smile the entire night was perfection and you were so happy to be sharing this special day with those who love you most.
Well Blake, Happy 2nd Birthday kiddo. Your dad and I love you so, so much. We can't imagine this life without you and hope keep things going just as they have been.
Love, love, love
Mama & Papa
Monday, October 28, 2013
(Blake Month 23) October 28th 2013
Dear Little Boy,
Just wanted to stop in and say hello to the best boy I know. There are so many things changing and happening that I am sad to not be recording it all. For example, your dad has gotten you hooked on Superheros. You suddenly know all of their names and love to watch the cartoons. You talk about "Batman, Superman, and Green Latern," all the live long day. You find them in all the toy magazines. You pull down the movies and point to them. And when we go to the library you specifically look for "Superman Book." It is sweet and melting and gave me a great idea.
We were going to have a "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles" theme for your upcoming birthday party. They have been your favorite for a while and we wanted to celebrate that. But then, as time gets closer, I know I don't have time to plan and make it as excellent as I would want. So instead we are switching to a Superhero Party. We will just have some family and friends over for dessert and call it a party. I will make a cake and wear a cape and have a great time. It may be just a recent love you have developed for Superheros, but we are so happy with who you are right NOW that it seems to be a better choice all around.
You have been sleeping great, talking great, and eating great. You are just now starting to develop likes and dislikes when it comes to food. The one thing you consistently refuse to eat is lettuce. I know, LETTUCE is a little weird for a kid to eat. I totally get it. Other than that though, you are usually very willing to try new things and eat new meals. What you especially love though, and I don't think it will change any time soon, is cheese. You ask for it everywhere and eat it all the time. Cheese, cheese, cheeeeeeeese.
Last, but not least, you love your family. Your favorite person in the whole world is Bapa. Just recently we have started calling him Grandpa, and you are slowly changing what you call him, but all the same you want to spend every moment with him. When GG calls, you want to talk to Bapa. When we get to the house, you want to play with Bapa. If he is outside, then you are outside with him. It melts my heart, and I'm sure you have that old man wrapped around your little finger. He simply cannot say no to you, and I don't blame him. your relationship is very sweet and he fears it won't last. I have other ideas about that and think you will be great friends always, but I guess only time can tell. For now though, you love him best and that is fine with me.
Love you tons,
Mama
Saturday, July 27, 2013
(Blake Month 20) July 27th 2013
Dear Little Bookworm,
You are loving the library these days. If the weather is good and I don't have the car I will pile you in the bike trailer and off we will go. You will sort through all the toddler books with precision, always looking for something with cars, or trucks, or Superheros. This book in particular has been one of your favorites. There are colors and shapes. You are just starting to get the difference between Batman and Superman. It is awesome!
I love sharing this time with you Blake. It is so, so good to know that you enjoy books and will sit down and give them time instead of just moving from one to the next. We read three books every night before you go to sleep. That quiet time together is probably my favorite time of day. Yes, some nights I just want to crawl in bed instead of take the 30 minutes you need to settle in for the night. Yes, sometimes I get frusterated reading the same three books you love over and over again. However, for the majority I LOVE every minute of our routine. I love watching you learn new words and new objects. I love hearing you repeat colors or phrases for me. I love the animals you know and the noises they make. You are smart kid!
Well, just wanted to say I hope you will still love to go to the library with me when you are older. It is time I treasure. Really, honestly, truly.
Love much,
Mama
Thursday, July 25, 2013
(Blake Month 20) July 25th 2013
Dear Blake,
You are just starting to get along with Pepper. I thought it would happen much sooner than this, but she kept her distance for a while and then you were kind of mean to her, espeically while you were learning to walk and always pulling on her hair and ears and tail. Now though, it is as if all those bad feelings have disappated. She runs with you around the house. You throw the ball for her in the yard. You laugh and giggle when she comes on walks with us. You absolutely adore when she comes in the car with us. I think you two are finally becoming friends.
I always laugh when you two are running around the house. You will steal her ball and just run, holding it up in your hand. She will chase you all over the house, just waiting for you to drop or throw it. You will roll it down the stair rail or drop it in a shoe and it cracks me up. I'm not sure if you are deliberately trying to frustrate her, but either way it is pretty fun. You boss her around a lot too: "Pepper no," "Drop it," and "Peppers sit!" are some of your favorites.
Summer really has brought out the best in both of you and I look forward to more time together, more bonding, and more laughs.
Love you kid,
Mama
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