(Week 6) Sunday, March 13th
Dear Baby,
I have one word for you, daylight savings. Yes, I am blocking it together as one word and am considering it to be one of the foulest four syllables in our entire language. You make me tired, already established that, but then try loosing an hour of sleep and things get ugly fast. That is what happened this Sunday morning. Ugly came out to play, and came out early.
This morning I had to get ready for church, print off my lesson, make muffins for my class, and take care of Pepper Potts. I am ashamed that this is my first mention of her, but Ppotts is going to be your guardian. She is our little Border Collie puppy, who is no more dog, but I can bet she will love you and play with you everyday. Moving on. It was tough getting up, feeling sick, and getting all of these things done. But, I did it!
I got to church and had to teach an extra handful of kids because their teacher didn’t show up. Not a bad thing except it meant that everyone only got one muffin. The lesson went well. I taught about parables and how Christ used them to teach his followers while also concealing the messages from those who wanted to persecute him. It was the parable of the sower we discussed in depth and it was delightful. I really love when a lesson comes together and I can hold the attention of my kids for the whole 40 minutes.
With this lesson I learned that I want to be the fertile ground. I want to be the place where the seeds of the gospel can be planted and grow to their full potential. I don’t want to be the wayside, the stony ground, or the thorny place. I also learned that I want you to be the fertile ground as well, but all I can do is prepare you to the best of my abilities and in the end it is up to you to take care of the seeds planted there.
Then, in relief society, I thought it would be hard to keep my happy news to myself. Thankfully I came to find out that I don’t mind keeping you a secret for now. It would be hard if something were to go wrong and I wouldn’t have to take all of those happy words back if I spill them out too early. Then we talked about service. How service is what makes us better children and followers of God. How service fosters love and charity. This lesson was meant for me. Lately I have been having some anxiety about raising a child, especially in this crazy, messed up world. But I am also scared you might be born with disabilities. That would be so very hard for me to bear. But I found comfort in the thought that I am surrounded by wonderful women who have gone through the things I will have to go through. They are so willing and ready to help. That lifts the worry a little, but I can’t help wanting you to be healthy, pure, and whole.
Love you so much,
Love Mama
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